write

so many things go through my head.
i've been trying to sit and write.
been having a hard time.
everytime, i sit down, i pop back up again.
restless.

been spending the last two days organizing and cleaning up the clinic.
while i was gone, my things were shifted around.
construction dust everywhere.
i'll feel more settled when things are put away, i think.
i'm so particular about my things.
it's kind of funny.
my virgo, i guess.
of course brought back a bunch of stuff with me.
i won't be needing cotton rounds nor dental floss for at least 6 months, i think.

need to get a bookshelf made.
(i wonder how much that will cost...)
many, many books.
looking forward to study.
actually looking forward to learning calculus and physics.
didn't stick the first time around kasi.
also have precept study with my fellow Students from the Center.

brought back with me a bunch of my art supplies.
will be painting and drawing again.
looking forward to playing.
Cez and i have agreed to play and take pictures of our works and email them every third saturday of the month.

been working with a ridiculous schedule as of late.
going back and forth to manila, something like 3 times in the last week.
birthday parties, dinners, and despedidas.
so badly wanted to skip out, but in the end, decided to go to all of them.
it's all about relationships.

agnes turned 40. 80's party at club mwah. fake lacoste and sweater tied around my shoulders. danced the night away to depeche mode, cindi lauper, etc. honestly, 80's fashion is wrong. many were sporting some mighty big shoulder pads that night. and side ponytails. and neon. what the hell were we thinking?

ate jovy turned 60. party at their house in antipolo. her cake was in the shape of a woman's torso, in a bikini. very strange. got all tearful, as her kids put together a slide show of their family photos. it was really beautiful. and of course, i missed my family all the more...

alan turned...well, i'm not allowed to say. but we celebrated his birthday at his friend's huge condo near ortigas. they go to film school together, and this place was all tricked out with dvd's galore (original, not pirated!), projection screens, computers, etc. met some very fine folk.

nathanel is back in the states. despedida was at UP. played guitar, sang songs, met more fine folk, and ate good food. japanese curry veggies and noodles. ube and buko pie, too.

cousin ohmar visted from the states. had dinner with him at shangri-la. then spent the night at the mandarin oriental before back to the clinic in the early morning. what a contrast that is.

congresswoman etta rosales and other important visitors came to the clinic, too. perhaps, some good will come of their coming. hopefully some funding and connections to local government and health agencies. will be organizing trips to the orthopedic surgeon and pediatrician for this month and could use some support in providing transportations for all the little ones and their mothers.

much to do for the clinic. need to draw up contracts for our amazing physical therapists, write a letter of intent to partner with angeles university foundation, home visits, charting, revamp the charting system, budget stuff, monthly reports to write, buy clinic supplies in manila and angeles...and on and on.

it's busy now.
once systems are in place, it won't feel so hectic.

it's been good to have a bit of solitude.
time to nap.
and just be quiet.
started meditating again.
will likely start up morning yoga next week.
will be cleansing, too.
soon, soon.

Cez texted the other day, "i feel like i am celebrating and struggling at the same time."

yah, i know the feeling.